Two essential metaphors that will change how you think about reader engagement.
“Call that the banana in the backpack metaphor,” I told a writer after explaining why his story opening wasn’t working. He’d been telegraphing plot developments before they happened, essentially telling readers what was in the backpack before asking them to be curious about it.
This led to a discussion of two related but distinct concepts that every writer needs to understand: the banana in the backpack principle and the backpack theory. Both use the same image—a backpack—but they address different aspects of the reader experience.
The Banana in the Backpack: The Curiosity Killer
The first concept comes from novelist Chris Offutt, who would bring a backpack to his writing classes and ask students: “Are you interested in what’s in the backpack? Are you curious? Do you want to guess what’s in the backpack?”
Students would lean forward, make guesses, engage with the mystery.
Then he’d open the backpack, revealing a banana. We knew what was there now. Curiosity satisfied.
But then he’d repeat the exercise differently. “All right, I got a backpack with a banana in it. Who wants to guess what’s in the backpack?”
The energy in the room would die. Students would say, “Well, you just told us there’s a banana in it, so we’re not very interested.” When he opened the bag to reveal the banana, no one cared. They’d already been told what to expect.
The Broadcasting Problem
This metaphor illustrates what writers do wrong when they “broadcast” their moves—when they tell readers what’s about to happen before it happens.
The writer I was coaching had done exactly this in his opening scene. A character draws his pistol and holds it above his head. Instead of letting readers wonder what he’ll do next, the writer added: “It did the trick, mayhem erupted as the kids ran back into the school.”
“Because that’s just another version of telling,” I explained. “It’s telling, it’s almost like a break in the chronology. Because in this moment, he shot. He pulled the trigger. He doesn’t know that it did the trick until he sees the next thing that happens.”
By jumping ahead to tell us the outcome, the writer had put the banana in the backpack and then announced it was there. Readers lost the chance to experience the suspense of not knowing what would happen.
The Chronology Break
The banana in the backpack problem often manifests as a chronology issue. Writers jump forward in time to give readers information that hasn’t happened yet from the character’s perspective.
“So it’s like you’re jumping ahead to tell us before he even sees it,” I told the writer. “Maybe it means that he saw it and you tell us what he saw, interpret it for us.”
The character can’t know his action “did the trick” until after he sees the response. When writers broadcast the result before showing the action’s impact, they’re breaking the natural flow of cause and effect that keeps readers engaged.
When he rewrote the scene where the character held the gun over his head and fired twice, then the villagers scattered, it worked much better.
The Backpack Theory: What Readers Carry
The second backpack concept is fundamentally different. This one, developed by Frank Conroy, treats reading like hiking up a mountain. Readers are doing work—climbing that mountain—and whatever content you give them, whatever information and plot threads you introduce, goes into their metaphorical backpack.
“So like for you in the prologue, you’ve given us this Knights Templar stuff,” I explained to the writer. “As I start to read about this thing happening in Italy, in Africa, I’ve got the Knights Templar in there, and I’m wondering, why am I carrying the Knights Templar info?”
Every element you introduce—every character, subplot, flashback, or mysterious reference—has weight. Readers carry that weight as they climb through your story. If the weight serves a purpose, if it pays off in a satisfying way, readers don’t mind carrying it. But if you load them up with information that never becomes relevant, or takes too long to land, they’ll get tired of the burden.
The Weight Test
The backpack theory forces you to consider every story element from the reader’s perspective:
- Why should readers carry this information?
- How long will they have to carry it before it becomes useful?
- Will the payoff justify the effort of carrying it?
- Are you asking them to carry too much at once?
“If you want to make that payoff later, it’s useful to keep in mind. There’s weight to the Knights Templar information in the reader’s backpack.”
The Payoff Timeline
The backpack theory also addresses pacing and structure. Information that readers have to carry for too long without payoff becomes burdensome. They start to resent the weight.
“Did I do it right to set it up so that they know part of why it’s in there? Am I going to make that pay off soon enough so that it’s not, like, an onerous thing to carry up the mountain?”
This is why many editors advise against prologues that don’t connect clearly to the main story. Readers spend the entire book carrying prologue information that may never feel relevant to what they’re actually reading about.
The Two Backpacks Working Together
These concepts work in tandem. The banana in the backpack principle tells you not to give away your story’s surprises prematurely. The backpack theory tells you to be mindful of what information you’re asking readers to carry and for how long.
Combined, they create a powerful framework for managing reader engagement:
Don’t put the banana in the backpack: Don’t tell readers what’s about to happen before it happens. Let them experience discovery and surprise.
Don’t overload the backpack: Don’t give readers more information to carry than necessary. Make sure everything in there will eventually be useful.
Make the banana worth carrying: If you’re going to ask readers to carry information for a long time, the eventual payoff needs to justify the effort.
The Practical Application
Here’s how to apply both concepts to your writing:
For the banana in the backpack principle:
- Let actions happen before revealing their effects
- Trust readers to understand cause and effect without explanation
- Preserve the chronology of how your character experiences events
For the backpack theory:
- List all the unexplained elements you’ve introduced (mysterious characters, unexplained events, cryptic dialogue)
- Ask yourself how long readers will have to carry each element before it pays off
- Consider whether each element earns its place in the reader’s backpack
- Look for ways to provide some satisfaction along the way rather than making readers wait until the end
The Reader’s Trust
Ultimately, both concepts are about building and maintaining reader trust. When you manage both types of backpacks well—when you preserve mystery without overwhelming readers, when you create suspense without spoiling your own surprises—readers trust you to guide them.
They trust that the questions you’re asking them to hold will be answered. They trust that the mysteries you’re creating will be worth solving. They trust that you’re not wasting their time or mental energy.
That trust is what keeps them reading, and what makes them eager to pick up your next book.
If you found this post helpful, other useful pieces might be Building Reader Capital and Speading It Wisely or The Hidden Cost of Point of View Shifts: Why Your Reader Capital Matters.
How conscious are you of what you’re putting in your readers’ backpacks? Have you noticed yourself broadcasting story developments before they happen, or asking readers to carry information that doesn’t pay off quickly enough? Let me know in the comments below.
